The Pope Is Dead

What’s with all this news coverage of the death of the Pope? All these “pilgrims” who made their way to Vatican City to hold up his picture and cry? Please spare me. Gahd.
First, don’t get me wrong. I’m not knocking him; from what I’ve seen of John Paul he was a lovely man. He was a Pope who got around. He visited countries and spread his goodwill. He took a bullet from some crazed Arabic assassin, then forgave the asshole! I would have had the guy filleted but I’m no Pope.
My complaint is that the media is going way overboard on him. The glorified teleprompter readers who call themselves journalists conjure up their most somber faces and can’t use enough superlatives about the dead Pope. The cameras pan over the thousands who pack St. Peter’s Church to pay their last respects but when does it end? It’s been 2 weeks now and they’re still displaying his body! Isn’t he going to start to smell a little ripe? Bury him and let’s get on with it already shall we?
Religion is such a racket anyway. It’s cashing in on all these scared humans who don’t know what they’ll do when they die. So they hedge their bets. If I kiss GOD's ass enough maybe he won’t put me through too much torture when I come up for my life’s behavior review. Oh bahruther! Puhlease! (Can I sound any more annoyed and exasperated?) Just get a clue people. The Pope was just a lucky old guy who sat in the Vatican and got his ass kissed by you babbling fools.